FRIDAY, Dec. 30, 2016 (HealthDay News) -- Doctors report that they have crafted a penis implant that becomes erect when heated. The new implant uses a heat-activated exoskeleton of nitinol, a metal known for its elasticity.
A urologist could do a simplified operation to insert the nitinol implant, which would remain flaccid at body temperature but could expand when heated. The implant designers are working on a remote-control device that could be waved over the penis to induce heat and expand the implant.
Huh. A heat seeking penis missile. What will they think of next? Will it automatically get hard in warm weather? Will it work better in hotter climates? Will the implant have automatic summer hard-ons? Will your cell phone signal accidentally activate it? When the guy with the heat seeking penis is done having an erection does he have to stick his dick in the freezer to make it soft again?