lottery clotheshorse



As I was awaiting the Mega Millions lottery drawing, where I was planning/hoping to win the $123 million jackpot, a thought occurred to me: what would I do with all that money? The answer? Anything I wanted to do! Then, I realized something. If I won $123 million I would not change my current wardrobe. Not needing to get dressed up or wear a suit, I normally wear jeans and a t-shirt. If I won the lottery and became a multi-millionaire, I would still wear the same clothes, and the same style.

I wear $14 jeans from Walmart, $20 shoes from Walmart, and $7 t-shirts, from a local convenience store, amazon, or a cheap local department store. On my head, I wear a cheap baseball-style hat, which I buy on amazon or at CVS. When the weather is cold, I wear a leather jacket (see my photo upper right), which I also bought at CVS, years ago, for under $30. And I wear a watch, a $22 watch, which I originally bought at Target and, years later, purchased an exact replica replacement on amazon.

I look good in clothes, even cheap clothes, but I am not a clotheshorse. If/when I win a ton of money in the lottery I would not change my look, I would not become a clotheshorse. Even though I would well be able to afford $400 jeans and $400 t-shirts I wouldn't do it, I have no need to be "uber fashionable". And, no, I would not buy a $10,000 Rolex either. At this stage of life, I don't want to dress "fancy", I just want to be comfortable. And $123 million would make me comfortable. Very comfortable.




Why we need a third arm



We humans don't have enough arms and hands. Two is not enough. Once upon a time, 2 arms and 2 hands were enough, enough to throw a rock or a spear or for fishing and farming, and do everything else humans wanted, and had, to do. No longer.

Since the Electronic Age, and the invention of the cell phone, we need another arm, another hand. For texting, typing, driving while texting, drinking while texting, changing the channel on the remote control while texting. Shaving while texting. Texting in the rain while holding an umbrella.

We could use another arm, another hand, for nearly ALL the activities we do today. And, yes, with a third arm and hand you could ... TEXT WHILE TEXTING! Yes, you'll also need a second cell phone for that.

C'mon, God, give us another arm, another hand. C'mon, science, let us add another arm, another hand. C'mon, genes, give future generations another arm, another hand. Another arm, another hand. We humans need three. That's evolution, baby!




Netflix is un-american



I am a Netflix subscriber. I am an American Netflix subscriber, like millions of other Netflix subscribers. I live in America. I want to see AMERICAN films and TV shows when I watch (and pay for) Netflix. No offense to foreign films or foreign TV, but I do not want to be offered tons of movies and TV shows in another language or subtitled or made in another country, with foreign actors I have never heard of, with hard-to-understand accents. Maybe it's cheaper for Netflix to acquire the rights to foreign movies and TV shows. I don't know and I don't care.

Netflix has 93 million subscribers worldwide, spread out over 190 countries. Netflix has over 50 million of those subscribers in 1 country - the U.S.

The U.S. is the capital of the world for entertainment - and Netflix should give U.S. subscribers more AMERICAN stuff to watch! Why, more and more, am I seeing lots of foreign movies and foreign TV shows being offered on Netflix, mixed in with the American fare? I am NOT interested in watching foreign entertainment. On Netflix, I want to watch Made in America entertainment!

Is Netflix being un-American? As far as I'm concerned, yes. Netflix should break down its listed film and TV offerings into 2 categories: Domestic (U.S.) and International. Or at least provide us subscribers a setting to choose one or both.




brand new computer nightmare



I just bought a brand new HP all-in-one 24-inch desktop computer and spent 5 full days setting it up. 11 hours a day x 5 days. At the end, after 5 full days, I discovered that my brand new HP computer was defective. They forgot to put in a critically important piece of equipment in it (the network card) when they made it. I spend hours on the phone with HP tech support. They officially diagnosed the network card problem. To fix the problem, I would have to send the whole brand new 24-inch computer back to HP for them to fix it. It would take 2 weeks. AND, there would be a good chance that my 5 full days of setting it up (transferring files, apps, settings et al) would be erased. If that happened, I would have to set it up all over again.

Obviously, this is a gigantic nightmare! I am too old for this sh-t. I decided to return the whole damn computer and get a full refund. Luckily, I still have the receipt and the old computer which I can hook up. But I still wasted 5 days. I still endured 5 full days of immense unhealthy frustration, anger and despair. I blame HP. I blame their defective electronic device. After decades of being a loyal HP desktop consumer, I no longer trust HP desktop computers and will not buy another one.

As a result of this nightmare, I HATE computers! In fact, I hate EVERYTHING new! They don’t make stuff correctly anymore, and we consumers get stuck with a lot of new but defective products. This is NOT progress!!!!!! They used to make stuff well, and improvements would make it “better”. Now, when they make, or improve, a product or service they f--- it up, beyond all repair. FUBAR. Or they make the new model more expensive - without making it better. With few exceptions, everything new that I have purchased in the last several years has sucked. Including computers. And my new toothbrush, my new t-shirts, and even my new underwear.

Maybe the millennials have a point: they buy little or nothing. Less is more. Nothing is everything. Or, let's go back to the time when they made stuff properly. That was in the 1950's. Or the 60's. Or the 70's. Or the 80's.




wasted



Here are some observations about life as a male, from an old guy -- me. I am no longer young, I'm old, and I sorely miss the strength and "immortality" of my youth.

A famous playwright, George Bernard Shaw, said that "youth is wasted on the young". He was right.

Here are some other things that are wasted on young males:

Hair is wasted on the young
That's what toupees are for. Or baldness. Or hats.

Teeth are wasted on the young
That's what dentures are for.

Erections are wasted on the young
That's what viagra is for.







I need to drink more



Suddenly, I am getting dry mouth. Really dry mouth. Often, my dry mouth is mild during the day but strong enough to wake me up in the middle of the night. After several weeks of suffering, and sucking on sugar-free mint candies, I decided to do some research on the causes and remedies of dry mouth. Here is what I found

The only cause that seemed to fit was dehydration. Dehydration? Not enough liquids? Yes. I had been drinking about 44 ounces of liquid a day. The old saying is: have 8 8-ounce glasses a day. That's 64 ounces. OK, so I'm a little below that threshold. But wait a minute ...

Then, in my research, I find a new "official" recommendation for daily hydration for adult males. 3.7 liters per day. That's 125 ounces! 125 ounces??? Are you kidding me? If I drank 125 ounces daily I would be peeing 50 times day!

Could I suddenly be dehydrated, which is causing my dry mouth? How could that be, I have been at or under the 64 ounces level for decades. So, if I believe or accept the "new" liquid intake level, I am more than 80 ounces under the new daily standard! According to the new standard, my daily liquid intake is WAY low. But there is no way I could drink over 100 ounces of liquid a day.

So, what will I do? I will increase my daily liquid intake another 17 ounces, bringing my daily total to 61. And we'll see if that solves my dry mouth problem. If it doesn't solve my dry mouth problem, I will spend the rest of my life sucking on sugar-free candies.